Truth

Ao, in fact, I wasn’t actually borrowing trouble as I was overthinking something I was already in the middle of. I was about 9 weeks along when I wrote that. And, in the end, when we told her Tuesday night, she was happy and totally normal about things. It was quite the pleasant surprise. She’d had just enough hints in advance that she wasn’t surprised, which, on the whole, was good. It means that whatever her actual first thought was, she didn’t have to share it with me. So, yay.

It’s been hard to keep this a secret! I’m a terrible liar and I feel bad for all the people who asked directly and I was all, “no news yet!”. It’s just… until we had the first ultrasound at 12+ weeks, I wasn’t sure any of this was actually real. It’s been an almost embarrassingly easy pregnancy, and with so few symptoms, I wasn’t sure that this one was going to stick around either. And while a loss in the early weeks sucked and made me sad, a loss at 12 weeks would have been pretty fucking devastating, and I didn’t want to share that with everyone, should it have happened.

But it didn’t, and the ultrasound showed a small flailing creature with little arms and legs floating inside me. David wasn’t wrong when after the ultrasound, he announced that it was the single most grown up thing he’d ever done.

So, well, that’s what I’ve been up to. That, and trying to finish the basement through the first trimester exhaustion. Fun times, I tell you, fun times.